Saturday, September 18, 2010
a whole new start of finals part 2,
my mind is so blank and numb of everything here,
probably bcz everything is so new and fresh to me,
new campus, new home with a stranger family,
in a far more hectic city as compared to my hometown,
i guess everything is just like a totally new beginning,
takes time to adapt to it.
life is pretty much like repetition from the past,
most of the time attending classes and studying,
but what's the biggest difference is,
i can say that i'm freed from a lot of unwanted family issues,
but on the other hand i'm kind of like restricted here,
everything is strictly about studying and attending classes,
moving into a big city supposed to be something fun and exciting,
but sadly i found that the reality is so much contrast from my expectations.
at least, i can shop, eat, chat whatever i want, laugh, relax and enjoy?
no such thing at all, strictly studying.
for like 7 months?
well maybe its something good bcz that's the reason i'm here.
looking around at my friends that i've known since year 1,
most of them struggling with their results,
undeniably, sometimes life is about accomplishing 'mission impossible',
is just about which mission u choose to complete,
yet u still need to challenge your own ability to do something which brings a breakthrough in your life,
i've understood this in a younger age,
which makes my next 7 months slightly easier according to the norm,
but deeply inside me, i'm kind of disappointed over myself,
i really doubted is this the best that i could have achieved?
i expected more.
and i doubted what i should do more to bring myself further.
that's my struggles.